Fatigued and Dazed....

Thursday:

I am very tired. Sleep deprivation. Good thing I'm not a mother. I hardly can imagine how new parents manage on lack of sleep. I'd be terrible.

It happens every year. Twice a year in fact. When the light changes, I get tired. My body slips easily into the gentle rhythm of a slower way of being in Winter, as my brain struggles to keep up the usual frenetic pace. In Spring, as it is now approaching, I try to reboot, but end up losing sleep. My brain wakes up but my body falls behind, reluctant to emerge from hybernation.

It began to get light at 6 this morning. What was I doing up, you ask? After being awakened at midnight, and floppng on the couch (B was fast asleep on the other couch having nodded off during a DVD we were watching), I couldnt get back to sleep and flipped channels for a while. Dozed. Was rudely awakened at 3 by his Lordship Pushkin, who decided that his OWN pillow would simply not do, and that MY pillow, indeed, my HEAD would make a better bed. Thanks, little ratbag!

I was irked enough to deposit him firmly, and consequently on his own pillow, which overlapped mine, you should know, so maybe he was confused about which one was his? No, He was very certain about my head being the better place to recline and drain the very heat from my body, whilst covering my face with long hair and, to add rudeness the affront, tap my head with his claws to demand that I make room for him.

More channel flipping. Then I dozed, with weird dreams until 5. Sought relevant news and was disgusted by the cheerful and chirpy, 1/2 clad BIMBOS who pretend to offer hard news, whilst SMILING as they tell us about terrible things.

Give me strength.

Today, needless to say, was a struggle, but I got to work early, always said, "I'm very well indeed, and how are you?" *bright smile* and wanted to fall down and hide in the cupboards below the counters to sleep. I did sleep, in fact, in a series of micro cat naps, during my lunch hour. No kidding.

Its past 9pm now and I've only just put dinner in the oven. I want to sleep for a week (or a month) and wake up to a world where war is considered in poor taste, and just isnt done, and is in fact considered bad management, and criminnal and the consequences of bad management are a trip to jail forthwith, do not pass 'GO', do not collect $200.-; where poverty no longer exists because money grows on trees. A land where doing what one loves is appreciated, and where children are safe.

Friday:

Main Entry: ec·cen·tric
Pronunciation: ik-'sen-trik, ek-
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English, from Medieval Latin eccentricus, from Greek ekkentros, from ex out of + kentron center

1 a : deviating from an established or usual pattern or style
b : deviating from conventional or accepted usage or conduct especially in odd or whimsical ways
2 a : deviating from a circular path; especially : ELLIPTICAL 1 b : located elsewhere than at the geometrical center; also : having the axis or support so located
synonym see STRANGE

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I am even more tired today, if that is at all possible, than I was yesterday. On Sunday I plan to sleep all day. My arse will not leave the couch. Except to run the dogs. How exciting.

In other news I found out that the breast groper IS in fact, 'like that' and IS, in fact, a really nice guy. He means nothing by his touchy-feeliness, and I am willing to concede that breast-contact was accidental. The next occasion of having to serve him was met by me with full emotional armour, and that in no way deterred the hand on the shoulder, the rubbing of my back, in a very childlike way. Moreover, I learned that he and his wife just buy people presents now and then, because. Because they can. He's an eccentric millionaire who has a thing with connecting with people in a tactile way. I dont think its a fetish. I think he's an innocent. So I'll get over myself, and think about my city-girl armour, and what it means to live on a small island with people who are odd.

Heaven knows, I'm odd enough myself.